The Frames - Falling Slowly

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'll paint it black

Games that never amount
To more then themselves
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time, raise your hopeful voice
You had the choice, and you made it now

I DID IT!

Well, I finally sucked it up and went for my first blood test ever yesterday. First of all, I am absolutely terrified of needles! I know, you're like, oh, whatever, needles are nothing. Yes, I realize they are nothing but just the thought of them sends me into a cold sweat. If I wanted to be used to stabbing pieces of metal into my flesh I would have been a heroine addict!

First they sit you in a cubicle (yeah, not even a room). I had an older lady and it went something like this:

Nurse - "How are you today?"
me - "Terrified"
Nurse - "Oh really, no worries, it's just a pinch."
me - "yeah sure"
Nurse - "When was your last blood test?"
me - "Never"
Nurse - "Really?"
me - "Yup"
Nurse - "I don't believe that"
me - "Nope, never had one before"
Nurse - "Are you sure? That's strange"
me (in my head) - "FOR CHRIST SAKES I SAID I NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE!"
me (out loud) - "Yeah, well I guess I'm just lucky"

...and then on with the little pinch. Little pinch my ass. Felt like cutting my arm with a freaking razor blade! If I ever decide to kill myself it will definitely not be with razor blades! Or needles! My arm still hurts. And supposedly that was a good nurse. At least I only have a little bruise. Apparently I'm just being a wuss. Oh well, it's done now. Hopefully never to be repeated. And I didn't cry, puke, or pass out! Yeah for me!

Thriving Ivory - Angels On The Moon

From LYRICSMODE.COM lyrics archive

...
So don't tell me if I'm dying, 'cause I don't wanna know
If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go
Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon
Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon

Yeah, you can tell me all your thoughts
'Bout the stars that fill polluted skies
And show me where you run to
When no one's left to take your side
But don't tell me where the road ends
'Cause I just don't wanna know,
No I don't wanna know
...

Say Anything - I Want To Know Your Plans

From LYRICSMODE.COM lyrics archive

...
You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead
Strength in my bones, put the words in my head
When they pour out to paper
It's all for you
'Cause that's what you do

No more fighting this is only a waste of our time
Oh 'cause soon we'll be leaving
Will this strength still be mine?

I'll look out for you
till I die, till I rot

Oh I'll remember you
till I die, till I rot
...

RIP Millie

On Sunday I found my cat Millie dead in the middle of the road out front of our place. Right in the middle of the road, soaking wet, and dead. Obviously he had been run over. He was, after all, just a cat, so he probably wasn't paying attention to what he was doing and ran out in front of a vehicle. But still, who leaves a dead animal right in the middle of the road?

They obviously did not stop to check that he was actually dead and not laying there suffering. If they had stopped they would have realized that the cat belonged to someone, probably from the yard that it obviously just came out of and they may have come and told us what had happened. Or at least moved him to the side of the road. But we heard nothing. I found him when I went to go to town to pick up supper. Nice surprise right before we eat.

Millie was the biggest, suckiest baby ever. He cried constantly, unless you were petting him or he was eating. I even saw him cry in his sleep once. This may be because for the first part of his life we thought he was a girl! Thus the name Millie. He was a pain in the ass but I loved him just the same.

So we buried him out back beside Midget. We'll have to make him a cross (Midget too since his has disappeared, but that's a different story). I still have Jaxie, Ali, Frank, and Abi to keep me company, and I think Abi is prego so there will be more, but Millie will never be forgotten. It sure seems quiet around the farm now.