Pictures from My Garden

You Wanna Know What Pisses Me Off

Doctors, Hospitals, and Specialists, that's what. Now don't get me wrong, I would not trade our health system for anything, it's free and easy and that's excellent. And I know everyone is doing the best they can with what we have. But that doesn't mean I can't get pissed off and complain about it. I mean, give me a freakin' break.

You find a problem, so you go see your doctor. Your doctor says you should go see a specialist, okay, but it takes like 3 weeks to get an appointment, so you wait. The specialist says you need to have a procedure done, fine, but it takes 2 weeks to get an appointment, so you wait. Then the specialist says you need to come back for the results, good, another week wait. Then you need another procedure, and that will be a 4 week wait. This time you go back to your doctor for the results, that will be a 2 week wait, just to find out your doctor knows nothing, the problem is 3 times as bad as it was 12 weeks ago and you need to go back to the specialist, another week wait. And by the time you get any answers about anything, the stress has already killed you!

Seriously!

And half the time no one know what is going on or where any paper work is or anything! It's a good thing the secretaries and nurses are nice or everyone here would go crazy!

Makes me glad I don't get sick, not that I would go if I did :o)

I don't want to be the calmer-downer

I heard a comedian do a sketch about how with couples if one person is freaking out the other person automatically adopts the role of "calmer-downer". I think I found it so funny because it is 100% true. If I start having a breakdown or start freaking out, my better half becomes the calmer. If he starts having a breakdown or starts freaking out, then I become the calmer. It's a great setup, until you both need to have a breakdown, then what. Seems like whoever gets to it first gets to have it and the other person just gets robbed and is stuck being the calmer. I guess we could take turns, but that seems kind of strange. Once the "breakdown" moment has passed, it feels a little useless to have it. Sometimes you end up having a delayed breakdown and then the other person is like "aren't you over it yet, it's been forever". I guess it's everyone for themselves and whoever gets there first gets to have the breakdown and/or freak-out and the other will just have to wait till next time. I think I'm going to have to do some practicing :o)

What A Waste of Holidays

I am just finishing my first week at work back from Holidays. We had so much planned for our 2 weeks off. We were finally going to get the projects in the yard done! I was so excited. This is a summary of how it went:

July 4th - July 6th - weather: sunny and warm
- Visiting our new niece and nephew and other family away from home

July 7th - raining
- sat at home and watched it rain

July 8th - raining
- went shopping at the mall because it was raining

July 9th - raining
- took the car in to the shop because it was broken
- had a flat tire on the way to the city, it was changed in the pouring rain
- spent the whole day in the city and the car is still broken and had to spend a fortune on new tires because the flat could not be fixed

July 10th and 11th - raining
- sat at home and watched it rain
(Okay, seriously, I will go back to work if it doesn't stop raining!)

July 12th - cold but not rainy
- cut down trees and worked in the mud in the flower beds

July 13th - not too bad for weather
- doctor appointments
(Oh thank goodness the weather is going to smarten up...too bad it's wasted in the city)

July 14th - raining
- sat at home and watched it rain
(SERIOUSLY! ENOUGH WITH THE RAIN!)

July 15th - raining and cold
- changed taps in the house

July 16th - rain in the mourning but nice in the afternoon
- picked up the wood chipper and started chipping dead trees

July 17th - ahhhh...finally hot weather
- just in time to be chipping trees...nothing like 30C when you have to be working hard outside

July 17th - July 19th - really quite nice out
- off visiting family

Thankfully we got a little bit of work done. Kinda seemed like a waste of good holiday days. Although it probably would have rained no matter when we took them. I guess next time we should see when the farmers want rain and then book our holidays then. Maybe we could charge them for "rain days". Oh well, maybe next year will be better. And, of course, it has been gorgeous all week and is supposed to be in the thirties for the weekend.

Africa (Toto - cover) - Jimmie Inch

This is just cool!

Say Anything - Retarded In Love

...
I'm right here and I must admit
I've been pining for you
You're my wish
When I touch I myself I am be conjuring you
From fresh dirt
When we talk all night and the minutes are free
I just hope when I cast my spell, you'll be falling for me

Because
Falling in love could be the first thing
Falling in love could be the worst thing
Falling in love there's no rehearsing
Retarded in love

Jason Mraz Feat. James Morrison - Details In The Fabric

...
Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way

And, everything
Everything will be fine
Everything

All the details in the fabric?
Are the things that make you panic?
Are your thoughts result of static cling?

Are the things that make you blow?
Hell, no reason, go on and scream
If you're shocked, it's just the fault
Of faulty manufacturing
...

The Frames - Falling Slowly

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'll paint it black

Games that never amount
To more then themselves
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time, raise your hopeful voice
You had the choice, and you made it now

I DID IT!

Well, I finally sucked it up and went for my first blood test ever yesterday. First of all, I am absolutely terrified of needles! I know, you're like, oh, whatever, needles are nothing. Yes, I realize they are nothing but just the thought of them sends me into a cold sweat. If I wanted to be used to stabbing pieces of metal into my flesh I would have been a heroine addict!

First they sit you in a cubicle (yeah, not even a room). I had an older lady and it went something like this:

Nurse - "How are you today?"
me - "Terrified"
Nurse - "Oh really, no worries, it's just a pinch."
me - "yeah sure"
Nurse - "When was your last blood test?"
me - "Never"
Nurse - "Really?"
me - "Yup"
Nurse - "I don't believe that"
me - "Nope, never had one before"
Nurse - "Are you sure? That's strange"
me (in my head) - "FOR CHRIST SAKES I SAID I NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE!"
me (out loud) - "Yeah, well I guess I'm just lucky"

...and then on with the little pinch. Little pinch my ass. Felt like cutting my arm with a freaking razor blade! If I ever decide to kill myself it will definitely not be with razor blades! Or needles! My arm still hurts. And supposedly that was a good nurse. At least I only have a little bruise. Apparently I'm just being a wuss. Oh well, it's done now. Hopefully never to be repeated. And I didn't cry, puke, or pass out! Yeah for me!

Thriving Ivory - Angels On The Moon

From LYRICSMODE.COM lyrics archive

...
So don't tell me if I'm dying, 'cause I don't wanna know
If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go
Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon
Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon

Yeah, you can tell me all your thoughts
'Bout the stars that fill polluted skies
And show me where you run to
When no one's left to take your side
But don't tell me where the road ends
'Cause I just don't wanna know,
No I don't wanna know
...

Say Anything - I Want To Know Your Plans

From LYRICSMODE.COM lyrics archive

...
You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead
Strength in my bones, put the words in my head
When they pour out to paper
It's all for you
'Cause that's what you do

No more fighting this is only a waste of our time
Oh 'cause soon we'll be leaving
Will this strength still be mine?

I'll look out for you
till I die, till I rot

Oh I'll remember you
till I die, till I rot
...

RIP Millie

On Sunday I found my cat Millie dead in the middle of the road out front of our place. Right in the middle of the road, soaking wet, and dead. Obviously he had been run over. He was, after all, just a cat, so he probably wasn't paying attention to what he was doing and ran out in front of a vehicle. But still, who leaves a dead animal right in the middle of the road?

They obviously did not stop to check that he was actually dead and not laying there suffering. If they had stopped they would have realized that the cat belonged to someone, probably from the yard that it obviously just came out of and they may have come and told us what had happened. Or at least moved him to the side of the road. But we heard nothing. I found him when I went to go to town to pick up supper. Nice surprise right before we eat.

Millie was the biggest, suckiest baby ever. He cried constantly, unless you were petting him or he was eating. I even saw him cry in his sleep once. This may be because for the first part of his life we thought he was a girl! Thus the name Millie. He was a pain in the ass but I loved him just the same.

So we buried him out back beside Midget. We'll have to make him a cross (Midget too since his has disappeared, but that's a different story). I still have Jaxie, Ali, Frank, and Abi to keep me company, and I think Abi is prego so there will be more, but Millie will never be forgotten. It sure seems quiet around the farm now.

May Long Weekend Fun

For the May long weekend we packed up the quad and headed to the outlaws farm for a family get-together. Some of the other family members also brought their machines. Adam's youngest sister and her fiance just bought a Yamaha side-by-side. It was pretty cool. Plus it could carry a cooler!

We spent Saturday playing in the mud. That was the first time we had ever been stuck. The nice thing about having other people around is that there's someone to put you out! One thing I noticed about the side-by-side is that you tend to get muddier, as Meagan discovered!



Later in the evening we went out and found the perfect water hole to play in. No threat of being stuck in this one even though the water must have been at least 3 feet deep.

Here's a video of us racing through the water.



It was sooo nice to actually have some fun and forget things, even if it was only for a day.

My First Sunburn Of 2009

The sun actually came out long enough on Sunday for me to get a burn. The one thing about my skin is it is either white or red, no tan, so it's not like it will even turn into a nice tan. It will just get dry, peal, and go right back to white, ready to burn all over again.

Adam and I were hanging out in the yard on Sunday when he suggested we go for a "quick tour". I agreed as long as it was quick because I wanted to get some work done in my flower beds. But once we started touring around the hills we found it hard to stop. It was soooo nice out and there was all sorts of wildlife up and about. We ended up being out for a good 1 1/2 hours. Now both of us have bright red arms and faces.

But I will take it. It was so nice to get away from everything for a while.

It's all over but the crying...

And that will be over soon. My cousin died on Sunday afternoon. So now we make the long trek back to St. Albert. At least our hotel has a liquor store in it!

And now I am left wondering who's next...

The Killers

And the decades disappear like sinking ships but we persevere
God gives us strength but we still fear what we don't know
The mind is poison

Castles in the sky sit stranded, vandalized
The drawbridge is closing

Ready To Go

So I have google mapped pretty much everything we will need to know. Bought one auto-fish-feeder but still need to find another. Loaded up the lap top with everything we need (except the maps, still need to save those). Now I just have to pack everything else. I wonder what I will forget.

I am afraid to go. Makes me nervous leaving my home and my animals. I don't like it. I guess I'm kind of a worry-wort. I don't like not knowing what is going on at my house. What if Jaxie gets stuck outside and can't get to her food for three days. What if one of the cats gets run over and I don't find him/her for three days. What if the auto-fish-feeder falls over and the fish don't get food. But I'm afraid not to go. My cousin was in and out of consciousness yesterday so this could be it. But that also makes me not want to go. I am eager to get there but I will have a tough time getting in the car to leave. Oh well, we all must do things that are hard. I guess that's just life.

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Surprise! I'm going on a trip...

...to Morinville Alberta! That's right, I'm leaving the province! Yeah for me! We are going over the long weekend. Three whole days away from my animals, that's a big step for me. I hope they will be okay. It'll be the first time being alone for the fish. Hope they don't hate me! (Yes I know I sound like a crazy person. If you know me then you know it is because I am totally crazy! That's why I live in the middle of nowhere and never go anywhere.)


View Larger Map

My family is gathering there because my cousin is in the hospital there. We are taking our new car. And my sister is coming with us. Should be interesting, Adam, me, and Erin all in a car for 6 1/2 hours. I will definitely take the camera.

Happy Birthdays for Everyone!

Well, not for everyone. That's just me exaggerating!

It is my cousin Landon's 22nd Birthday today. Yesterday they moved him from the Tofino Hospital back to a hospital in Edmonton. Everything went well except my uncle and aunt had to pay for a private charter plane to fly them back because neither the BC government or the AB government would help them pay/organize anything to get him home.

The other birthday is my sister tomorrow. Happy Birthday Erin!

My Hair is Still Long

Well, a late March rain/snow storm kept me from getting my hair cut this weekend. I was actually looking forward to it. Oh well, I guess another week of growth won't hurt anything. The weather here has bee super crazy. It rained all day yesterday and then snowed all night and then the wind came and mixed everything together into a big mess.

Speaking of weather, last week a friend of ours participated in "5 Days for the Homeless". 5 of them basically lived like a homeless person to raise money for at risk youth in Saskatoon. It was very cold last week (-36C) and snowy and they slept outside on pieces of cardboard. They raised a tonne of money. Great job guys! Check it out at 5days.ca.

What Would You Say To Cancer

This is an awesome video! You will need sound for it.



I would say "Fuck you". That pretty much sums it up.

What would you say?

Speaking of cancer, I have made an appointment to get my hair cut on Saturday. I am the last volunteer donor to cut their hair. And I am terrified. It has been over a year since the last time I got my hair cut. I am going to look like a total freak. Oh well, I guess it's for a good cause!

Say Hello to my little friends...

We bought a fish tank a little while ago and finally have filled it.

We bought two sucker fish (which are actually catfish but I can't remember the technical name, something like Pseudacanthicus), two tiger oscar cichlids, and two albino tiger oscar cichlids.



Fish are amazingly difficult to take pictures of so here's a short video

It's turning into a regular petting zoo at our farm. But, I wouldn't pet the dog, or any of the cats, or the fish. I guess it's more of a "look but don't touch" zoo. So now come the hard part, naming them. I've never had to name a fish before. I was thinking Breakfast, Brunch, Lunch, Supper, Sucky, and Sucker but they aren't very creative and may in fact offend some people. So if you have any good fish names (not Nemo!) then let me know. I guess first I really have to figure out how to tell them apart!

And the wait begins...again

I am so very tired of having to do this kind of waiting. I thought that 2009 was going to be different. Apparently I thought wrong. I have done this kind of waiting at home, at school, at work, and at the bedside. Strangely, I think I prefer bedside. At least there you can offer some sort of comfort to the people who need it most. Here, there is just the waiting.

My cousin has had two operations in the last year and a half to remove cancerous tumors from his brain. The operations were almost exactly one year apart. After the first one, everything was going great. He only spent three days in the hospital and then was sent home. Chemo and radiation went well. He was hardly sick at all and was in high spirits. He took everything extremely well, especially for being so young.

Then he had a headache and they found another tumor. That was like November last year. Three days in the hospital and he was sent home to recover, again. Again with radiation and chemo, and again, it all went really well. So well in fact that his whole family (his mom, dad, and younger brother and sister) took a relaxing vacation out to Tofino, BC a couple weeks ago. I received pictures of them surfing and hiking and playing in the water. Then he collapsed and went into a coma. He is now semi-conscious in the Palliative Care Unit in the hospital in Tofino.

So again, I wait for a phone call that I know is coming but hope it never does. Every time the phone rings, there is a sick feeling in my stomach. But I still stay up nights listening for fear I will miss it in my sleep. I pray for peace at an end that I wish would never come. I feel hopeless and helpless about a situation no one can do anything about.

I feel empty and exhausted. Again.

Christmas Crafts

I was pretty busy this year making gifts. I like to make gifts. This first one wasn't actually for Christmas. A friend had a baby boy and I made it for him. This isn't the finished project but you get the picture.

This next one I made for my mother-in-law. It turned out nice a big and warm. I was relatively pleased. It was a relatively easy pattern but it turned out really nice.

This is one that I made for my god-son. I love how the lions mane and the eyes are attached after so they have some definition and it gives him something to feel and grab on to. Plus it's super cute!
This is a dishcloth I made for my mom. I have made quite a few dishcloths but she wanted one that was Christmassy, and this is what she ended up with. Turned out pretty good to me.
And this last one is the blanket I mad my sister. She likes orange. This blanket didn't have as much orange in it as I had hoped but it turned out nice anyway. It was soft and squishy and really warm. Perfect!
Now I need to start on next year. No more leaving it until October to start!

Thanks Dear!

Thanks to my husband for contributing to the cause! Not a bad total so far. Hopefully I will make the $1200 before cutting my hair. That's the goal anyway. I'm hoping to have some stuff to sell to raise money after Christmas. This time of year is so busy that I just don't have time right now, but soon.

Thanks Steve!

Thanks to Steve for making a wonderful contribution to the cause!

This is especially important to me now. A cousin of mine had a cancerous brain tumor about a year ago. They operated and removed it and put him through chemo and radiation. He was to finish his radiation at the end of November because there had been no sign of the tumor returning. On November 22nd the tumor came back and on November 30th they operated again to remove it. Back to square one. He had been clear for so long, we never saw this coming. It's been a devastating blow to the whole family. So now we start praying and waiting all over again.

Thanks to everyone who has donated hair and money! It means so very much to everyone!

Thanks Kim!

Thanks a million Kim for contributing to the cause!

I was reading a blog the other day and came across a link to a website called Gender Analyzer. You put in the link to a blog (or any web site) and it will tell you if it was written by a male or a female. Sounded cool to me so I went to try it out. I started with all the blogs I read and it was correct on every one of them (it was almost wrong on one, written by a man but found to be almost gender neutral). So then I thought I would run mine through. It was like 86% male. Hmmm...that's strange. The last time I checked I was a girl, but I guess I have to check again. I'd like to know what sort of algorithm they use to determine the gender. Maybe that's why I never wear dresses, I'm actually a boy. All these years I never knew. I bet my husband will be very surprised! Oh well, I guess it's not so bad. I write like a boy. Big deal. I also swear like a trucker! Works for me, even if it doesn't for others. They know what they can do with their opinions!

Some People Just Don't Care

Why would you even want to work at a job you don't care about? I can see if you need the money, but then go work at McDonalds or Wendy's or something. Don't trash the stuff other people actually care about. When I started my job 7 years ago (7 years!?! Where did that go?) I didn't take a holiday for 2 years and I didn't miss a day of work in the first year. I wanted this job and I wanted everyone to know that I wanted it and that I really cared about being able to work here. That just doesn't happen any more. Half the time people don't show up for work and they don't listen to what you try to tell them to help them learn. Doesn't seem to matter how many times I tell these people the way it works around here, they just don't listen. People higher up then me have even told them and they still don't listen. What is so hard to understand about "PAIR PROGRAMMING EVERYTHING" or "IF IT'S NOT MINOR DON'T DO IT BY YOURSELF"????? I just don't get it. It's like they are totaly oblivious to anyone else and they are all hot shit and they know everything and don't need to listen to anyone else. How can you do that? How can you just start a job and asume you can do whatever you want? That is not a good first impression and it's all about the first impression. If you screw that up, that's it. At least pretend like you want to try to be good at your job. If you can't do that, then get lost. And on top of everything, they still get paid. And probably the same as the rest of us who work our asses off because we want to be here and truely care about the company and the software. Maybe we're the ones that have it all wrong. Apparently these people have figured out how to get paid to do nothing. Must be nice for them since the rest of us are left doing our own work and theirs.

Ahhh...that's better.

Thanks Boss!

A huge thanks to my boss, Andrew, who made a very generous contribution today! THANK-YOU! THANK-YOU! THANK-YOU!

I was going to straighten my hair and measure it on Sunday but the TV's call was too strong. It's probably over 8 inches now. I will not cut it until the other two hair donors have cut their hair. Maybe I'll have enough for two donations.

A Courageous Fight With Cancer

If you find yourself with some spare time, I encourage you to take a look at www.fatcyclist.com and read about Elden and his family's battle with cancer. His wife has been fighting cancer for a long time and he has been blogging about it. Unfortunately, she is now losing her battle. It is a good example of why we need to join together to fight this ruthless beast so it can no longer ruin lives. Be sure to leave your support in the comments.

David Copperfield

We went to see David Copperfield last night. He looks so much older in person then on TV. I guess that's part of the illusion! And he was really full of himself. First of all he was 20 minutes late. Boo. But still ended on time. He opened the show with a bunch of video clips of every time he had ever been mentioned on TV or in movies. Seemed kind of strange. Then in the middle of the show they showed another video clip of a trick he did like 15 years ago. Don't get me wrong, the show was great, just a little strange.

For the last trick, he had all these balls thrown out into the audience and whoever caught them when the music stopped got to go on stage. There were 2 balls on our balcony and the two guys who touched them first threw them off the balcony to the main floor! Ugh! I wanted to disappear!

Oh well, I still had a good time.

The next show we are going to is Just For Laughs in November. Hopefully, after that it will be James Blunt, but I'm still working on that one!

Thanks Dorlan!

Thanks to Dorlan for donating!

More Thanks

A big thanks to my Mom who made a contribution over the weekend! Now that's Thanksgiving!

Also thanks to Penny who just came to my desk and made a contribution!

Another Big Thanks

Thanks to Wendy for making a donation!

I think I'm going to have to come up with an idea to encourage people to donate. Maybe I could make some stuff and have a draw or a few. Or just give people stuff for donating. We'll see.

And I'm on my way

I received my first cash donation today. Thanks Leeann!

More Donors

A huge THANKS to Danielle and Brittany for volunteering to grow their hair for cancer! That makes 3. Only 9 more to go!

Growing Hair For Cancer

Yes, you read the title correctly, I am growing hair for cancer.

I have seen people I love battle with cancer, as I am sure most of you have. Seems like everyone these days has or knows someone who has some sort of cancer. And everything you touch, eat, drink, or even look at will give you cancer. And I am sure that some day I too will have a battle with cancer.

Now what does this have to do with growing hair you may ask. Well, I have lots of hair, I always have. When you get cancer and start going for treatments, your hair falls out. I could not even begin to imagine what it would be like to have no hair. I mean, sure you'd save on shampoo but your head would be cold and naked. When battling cancer, not only do you have to deal with a tonne of stuff like going to a million appointments, taking medicine so you don't feel sick from the medicine you take so you don't feel sick from the chemo and radiation, being tired all the time, and possibly dying, you also get to deal with not having any hair and everyone staring at you because all of a sudden you don't have any hair and them all knowing that you are sick, and that you probably look sicker then you really are because you don't have any hair. When you really think about it your hair is a big part of you.

So, how can we help? By growing hair and then cutting it off and making it into wigs! I am going to do the growing part. I'll leave the cutting and wig making to the pros. All you need is 8 inches of untreated hair. It's easy! You just sit around and concentrate really hard on growing your hair. You can even do it while watching TV! Can't grow your hair because of hereditary baldness or you just don't think you could stand the ridicule? You could donate money instead. It takes 12 hair donations and $1200 to make ONE wig. That's one expensive hair cut!

I am trying to find 11 other people to make hair donations and to raise $1200 in donations. If you are interested in either part, let me know. One wig doesn't sound like much, but it could make a world of difference for someone.

I will be posting about progress so stay tuned. I need to get a trim so I'll do an official first measurement after that.

Among the animals

We went to the Saskatoon Zoo at the Forestry Farm a couple weeks ago. Neither of us had been there before and it was a beautiful day so we went. It was also one of the last weeks the baby tigers were going to be there.
They were almost impossible to get a good picture of. They were behind a pane of glass that was so covered in finger prints and other goo that you could barely see through it. We were outside looking in at them so there was also a lot of glare. I did my best. They were cute and definitely the main attraction. Everyone there wanted to see the baby tigers.

Next to the baby tigers were a couple monkeys. Not quite as popular but more enjoyable to us. This little fellow just sat and ate his banana. He was cute.
There was a lot of geese and ducks and peacocks around. And they had swans in one part.
The wolves were huge and very stinky. They reminded me of Midget. It was really hot out that day so everything was just sort of lying around. It was still strange to be standing so close to what could be a vicious animal and only a chain fence between you. And yet it's almost sad to see them there.
And of course there is the adult tigers. I think them and the grizzly bears were my favorite. I just could not get over how big they are. You see them on TV and you know that they are big but you never fully appreciate it until you're standing face to face with them.
The zoo was also full of baby animals. Here is a baby Yak.
And a baby caribou.
And this is an adult caribou. I just like the picture.
It was a fun day. And then we went home to our own "forestry farm". We came across these bison on a quad ride one day. They were following us. I guess they thought we were going to feed them. It was a pretty big heard. And lots of babies!
And then we came home one day to find a humming bird in our garage. That was pretty strange!And we can't forget the dog and cats. We've also had a skunk in our shed and a snake in our garage. There are bald eagles, geese, sandhill cranes, ducks, moose, elk, porcupines, white tail, and mule deer around us. And I'm sure many more that we never see. And it doesn't cost us a dime to see them. That's a pretty sweet deal to me!

Babies Again

Our cat was pregnant. I'm not too sure how pleased she was about that. We constantly had to chase her away from the beer.

This is about 2 days before she had them. She was really big! It looked like she had a barrel around her waste.
And, for some strange reason, she spent the whole week before sleeping in this flower pot.
Last Friday we came home from work to find Ali in a box with 6 baby kittens.



All white except for one gray. Well, we've done the puppy thing, I guess it's time to do the kitty thing. I feel sorry for Jaxie (our dog). She is way outnumbered now!

Wedding

I got married on July 19th. It was an amazing day. Just about everyone made it. We didn't have a drop of rain and barely a breeze. It was overcast so it wasn't unberably hot. The dog didn't bark and the birds were quiet for a change. No body got overly carried away. Basically it went off without a hitch. But now I think I'm suffering from PPD. I sit at home and have nothing to plan, nothing to make, no one to call about things, no ideas to look for, nothing to decorate. All that is left is a mess to clean up. It's kinda depressing. I also have various regrets popping into my head now. I forgot to put the fake rose petals on the aisle. I didn't hug my dad at the end of the aisle (that really bothers me). I should have gotten a better tan (it looks like I have a serious farmers tan in the pictures). I should have worked out more 'cause I kinda look like a tent (white and strapless just do not work for me!). I should have danced with my new husband whether we had an "official dance" or not. I should have made an announcement about the fireworks we had after because maybe more people would have stayed for them. There are a few pictures I wanted the photographers to take that I forgot about. I don't think everyone got a tour of the house. And the list kinda goes on and on. And there really isn't anything I can do. It's over and it won't ever happen again and that's just the way it is. That was my day and now it's over so I should just be happy I ever got it at all 'cause some people never do. God I'm getting soft in my old age! Imagine what I'll be like at 35!

Graveyard

We were out for a tour a while ago and found a church and a graveyard in the middle of nowhere. I don't know why but old graveyards and stuff seem so interesting. It's kinda fun to check out the dates and names and think about what happened and what their lives were like. Must have been a settlement years ago.
The newest tombstone said 1999 but the oldest was 1913. Although there were others that had no dates on them. Half of them were not in English. The consensus seems to be that it's Ukrainian which makes sense because the area is full of French and Ukrainian people.
One thing that we noticed was that there were lots of children and babies buried there. I assume that would be relatively common 100 years ago. There was one where the mom died the day after the baby was born, the baby died three years later, and then the dad died right after that. The other son only lived to 34. Craziness.

The family name on this one "Sopotyk" is the name of a road out here. Guess they were an important family.
We tried Googling the name of the church but it did not really find anything. There is no real signs of a settlement here either. A couple old farm sites but nothing else really. Although I guess all the land around here is either thick bush or farm land now. It's kinda too bad, it would be cool to know. I guess I could find out who takes care of the place (the lawn is mowed) and ask them. It's probably the RM. Or maybe it's better to just keep it a mystery!

Sunsets

We found this nice little trail the other day. Looked like a nice trail so we followed it. It went on for a fair ways. You could only see maybe 5 feet into the bush and that was it. It was cool. Imagine finding a trail like this in the middle of the prairie. Lucky us!

It led out to a horse pasture but also to the top of a hill with a great view.

I can see my house from here! But only when I use the zoom :o)



We saw people riding their horses around inside the fence line. This would be beautiful country for horse riding. Someday we'll be able to join them.

Around the country side

We went for a tour the other day and saw some wildlife. Well, only a porcupine, some ducks and birds, and some moose. There were three moose. I think that the one was probably a year or two old and the other two looked like this year, and relatively new too.

I only got a picture of the porcupine butt though.


Can you see the babies? (you can only see one of the babies in the pictures because the other did not stand up) I wonder where the mom is ?


The one baby did stand up to be counted!


I kinda wish we would have seen the mom but on the other hand, I'm kinda glad she wasn't around. She had her kids in a good spot though. They were basically on an island surrounded by thick bush and water. We hadn't seen any moose around since last year. It's nice to know they are still around. Now if the bald eagles would come back, we'd be set!

Yard Work

I like spring. I'm not going to say I love it because it is a lot of work and is very busy, but I like it. Finally got all the lawn mowed. That only took 9 hours over 4 days. Now the first part that I mowed is ready to be done again. Oh well, it's good exercise. Now if I can just get all the weeds out of my flower bed it would all be good. Just as soon as I finish I have to go back to the beginning and start all over. Especially with the dandelions. Darn things. But I finally have some flowers starting to bloom and they are so beautiful it makes it all worth while.

Plus I get to spend time outside and my cat really enjoys helping with the flower beds (actually, she just likes to lay next to me and watch me work!).


Still lots to do before July! Now if the weather would just smarten up! Painting in the rain just does not work very well.

Getting Real

I just finished reading "Getting Real - The smarter, faster, easier way to build a successful web application" by 37signals. It was a pretty good book. I'm pretty sure I have read it before. But that's okay because it has a lot of good ideas in it. After I was finished, I just wanted to get on my computer and write something, but I was in a vehicle 30 minutes from home on my way to work so that didn't happen. And when I got to work I was like "okay, time to get real" but most of their ideas won't really work here because they are aimed more towards online projects and start-ups. Our software has been around for a few years already so we don't have to worry about start-up stuff anymore and it's not online and we do allow customers to get customized changes and we have meetings every morning. I would still like to try to start something at home but I have no ideas. I don't think I'm interested in doing anything really serious right now either. Books are always like "find a need and fill it". But I don't really want to unless it's the need for a game. But pretty much every game under the sun has been done already. Plus, I would have to get online and learn something like Ruby on Rails or something. Or I could just do something for fun again like the trucking monopoly game. That turned out alright. I still play it at home (and I don't even win all the time). I'm kinda trying to plan a wedding for the summer so learning a new language right now might just take up too much time. Maybe in the fall. But I almost need a laptop or something because my other half likes to be on the computer in the evening to play his games. Oh well, back to the work that pays my bills!

Bad Things Don't Come In Threes

I feel like I am doomed to live my life sitting in hospitals while people I love are sick and sitting at funerals when those I love die. It's pretty much been 7 months of hospitals and funerals. What's even the point of being here if everyone just gets sick and/or dies. And that's just the people I know. There's a whole world of sickness and death. And those that are not sick or dieing are shooting each other and blowing each other up in pointless wars. My grandpa, my godson, my sister, my great aunt, and now my dog. I mean, really, how much are we supposed to just sit around and take. I guess all you can do is just suck it up, have a drink, and wait for what will come next. At least I still have my job!

Moved

Well, we are now moved. Moving is always an interesting adventure. First you have to pack up all the crap you've accumulated over the years (6 years for us). You also have to decide what crap you actually want to pack and what you could not care less about. We probably had three truck loads of garbage. I don't understand where it all comes from. It's not like our old place was a total trash hole and it really wasn't that big so I'm not quite sure how soo much garbage was hiding in it. Oh well, it's gone now. Then you get to load everything up (for those of you lucky enough to have movers come in and do this all for you, I am most envious). We used a stock trailer. We were like "This thing is almost bigger then the trailer, I'm sure everything will fit in it". Of course, we were wrong. We stuffed as much as we could in that and the car and there was still more. How on earth did we get so much stuff! And we didn't even take the couch, fridge, or stove. My god, we have enough towels for all of Canada! Why? I have absolutely no idea. Then you make the long drive to the new house and unpack all the crap you decided not to throw away. Then you have to find a place for all of it. I'm pretty sure I've moved the mess around the house about 6 times now. It's finally all in the basement so at least I don't have to look at it. I figure things will get put away as they are used. And now we have at least twice as much space as we did before. I guess we had better buy some more crap to fill it up!

Facebook

Facebook is something that I'm sure everyone has heard of by now. I had received a few invitations to join and eventually gave in just to see what it was all about. Of course I am now hooked. It is actually pretty cool. They put a bunch of extra crap in there like different applications you can add to your page (i.e. Pirates, movie ratings, zombies, horoscopes, fortune cookies, pets, etc.) which is really pretty useless. The cool part is how many people are actually using it. I have found people I haven't seen in 16 years. That, to me, it pretty amazing. I guess the downside would be that people can also find you, whether you want them to or not. I find it very convenient for sharing photos. It is very easy to upload and add comments to pictures. They also have this option where you can select a region containing someones face and name it and if they are on Facebook too you can link it to their profile. I guess the messaging part is basically just like email. You have an inbox where you get messages but you can also post messages on other people's (or your own) "wall". All of the people who are in that profiles "Friends" list can then see that message. Nice for getting a public message out to all your friends (not that you can't do that with email too). To me it seems a little more personal then email. Maybe it's because it feels more like real-time then email because of the way the message board is setup. All in all, to me, it seems like a great way to make the world a little smaller.

Excited to Move

We finally get to move. It's so very exciting, nerve racking, scary, and exhausting. There is so much to do. I can hardly believe it has been almost 6 years already since the last time I moved. How time flies by.

Kaiser

Since it seems like I will be sufferring a lack of inspiration for an indefinite period of time, I have started a Kaiser game. I need to practice figuring out logic and stuff anyway. This time, to try to get the logic somewhat correct for the computer players, I am writing tests for things I need the code to be able to do and then writing the code to do it. I know this is how you are supposed to code anyway but the City Builder project ended up with the majority of the code in a controller and could not be easily tested (not that that's an excuse, but since it was just for me I kinda slacked). This time I'm trying to keep the code isolated in a class and independent of variables in the controller. That will make it easier to write tests and it will make it easier to change the interface without losing all the code if I should need/want to later. I'm kinda trying to concentrate on getting the code I need to make it functional first and then I can concentrate on the user interface. See if I can't get some good enough graphics to appeal to some of the more seasoned players.

Searching for Inspiration

I wrote a game. It's like monopoly. It was fun. And good practice for work since it was in the same language as what we use to write our product. Plus, it was fun. I was going to rewrite it in something that would allow online play but as I thought about it more, it probably wasn't going to happen anyway for many various reasons. So now I want to do something new. The problem is what to do. I've been reading 'chris crawford on game design' and the last bit is all about games he has developed and how he went about the logic and stuff. He has a lot of good ideas about how to design the gameplay first and the interface later and that kind of thing. So now I know a better way to go about designing a game I just don't have a game to design.

Where do you find a good idea? I don't even care if it's a new idea or not, I just want a good idea. I was thinking Kaiser because that's something that I want to play and can't find, but it's kinda a boring idea. I suppose it would keep me occupied for a while anyway. That would be a cool game online, but when you only have dial-up, it's hard to develop and maintain an online game. Plus you have to find a place to host it and get a domain name and all that crap.

Are games like stories? Do you write what you know? Obviously everything I know has already been done otherwise I wouldn't know it. Plus, I'm not a 3D graphics expert or video expert or anything like the designers who create todays computer and console games so anything I know is way out of my league anyway. I could take an existing idea and make it into something in my league like I did with the monopoly idea but then no one would want to play it, like the monopoly game.

I guess that's why I write trucking and accounting software and not games. Don't need a lot of creativity to figure out what gl accounts to use or how many reference fields to have on an order.

Tablets

So I got a tablet from work and it is awsome. I don't know why more people wouldn't be using these. The one I got came with a pen and a mouse. The pen is so cool. And so easy to use once you get used to it. You would think that would be the more logical move from paper to computer. I find it more comfortable to use. I also really like that you plug the tablet in and everything is powered off it. There are absolutely no batteries to replace. It's also nice that you can still have your regular mouse plugged in, especially if there are other people using the computer who might not be so thrilled about the tablet.

I have tried it out a bit doing some minor photo editing (removing red eye and cleaning up scratches and fuzzy spots) and it works really well. I like the preasure sensitivity feature.